EssentialsEssentials
October 2, 2025

Essentials: How Humans Select & Keep Romantic Partners in the Short & Long Term | Dr. David Buss

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In this Huberman Lab Essentials episode, my guest is Dr. David Buss, PhD, a professor of psychology at the University of Texas at Austin and a pioneer in the field of evolutionary psychology.

We explore the science behind human mate selection in both short- and long-term relationships. We discuss universal traits valued in long-term partners along with key differences between women and men in what they prioritize when selecting a mate. We also discuss the darker aspects of mating behavior, such as deception, the evolutionary function of jealousy and the motivations behind stalking.

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  • 00:00:00 David Buss
  • 00:00:21 Mate Selection, Preferences & Competition
  • 00:03:26 Desirable Qualities of Men & Women, Universal Traits for Long-Term Mates
  • 00:04:38 Women’s Preferences; Men’s Preferences; Age Differences
  • 00:08:58 Mate Deception & Online Dating, Tool: Travel, Stress & Emotional Stability
  • 00:12:07 Short- vs Long-Term Mates, Men vs Women Preferences
  • 00:14:23 Jealousy, Mate Value Discrepancy, Vigilance to Violence
  • 00:17:07 The Dark Triad, Sexual Harassment & Coercion
  • 00:19:14 Stalking, Motivations & Outcomes
  • 00:21:53 Childhood Attachment Styles & Relationship Stability
  • 00:22:58 Self-Assessment for Mate Value, Self-Esteem
  • 00:26:35 Evolutionary Psychology & Neuroscience
  • 00:27:20 David Buss’ Books; Acknowledgements

This transcript is currently under human review and may contain errors. The fully reviewed version will be posted as soon as it is available.

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Huberman Lab Essentials

Dr. David Buss: How Humans Select & Keep Romantic Partners in Short & Long Term

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